Oncologist tomorrow...

We were told six weeks ago that Jim's NSCLC Lung Cancer had returned. Last week Jim had a CT and a PET scan. Tomorrow my husband Jim should receive the results of these two tests. These test results should determine the rate of growth of the new cancer spots. The PET scan should also tell us if the cancer has spread to any other parts of his body. The ROG and location will help determine what options are available to Jim.

I do not know what the news will be. I am nervous, and a bit scared. I am fearful that it will be bad results. I know that there is nothing that I can do but wait and worry. I think that I will feel more comfortable once I hear the outcome, good or bad. After we hear the conclusions, Jim and I can make a plan. No matter the results, the waiting often seems worse. It has been a very long six weeks. At least when I have a plan, I will feel like I am doing something.

PET scan Feb 2014...

My husband Jim had a PET scan today. He was told last month that his NSCLC Lung Cancer had returned. This time the cancer is in his right lung. His left pneumonectomy was February 2013. We will not have the results of this PET scan or CT scan until next week. They will check the rate of growth of the "new" cancer; then they will give Jim his options so that Jim can make a new plan of action. Please keep Jim and my family in your thoughts and your prayers. 

Cancer has returned...

22Jan14: One year ago, on 22Jan13, I announced on FaceBook that Jim had cancer. Exactly one year later, I was on FaceBook once again to let friends and family know that my husband Jim’s cancer had returned.

Jim had a doctor appointment 22Jan13 and we did not receive the news we had hoped for. Jim’s bone scan was good, as expected. The CT scan showed nothing new in the brain, which is great news. The CT scan showed the previous 6mm mass in the lower right lobe is stable, unchanged, which is good because it has not changed. But, the CT scan did show a new 5mm abnormal mass in the middle lobe of the right lung. This is not good news.

The plan is to repeat the CT scan and blood work in six weeks to see the rate of change. There will also be a PET scan in six weeks because the PET will give more detailed information regarding the status of the 5mm mass in the middle lobe, and search for any other new cancers. Jim and I will meet with the oncologist after these tests to review the results and make a plan.

Jim’s attitude and spirits are both good. Of course, we are still processing the information. I’m sure we will have ups and downs. We are thankful for the good news that we received today. We will accept the bad news and deal with it head on as we explore our options. We still move forward with the phrases “it is what it is” and we will “play the cards that are dealt to us”.

We are thankful for our friends and family that has stood with us through this journey. Your love and support are very important to us.

We are thankful for those of you that follow us and give us moral support, your LIKES and words mean the world to us. This journey has been manageable because of the encouragement we have received from you.

Thank you, you know who you are… and we know who you are not. Yes, sadly, we know who who made their choice not there for Jim. 

New year 2014...

Just like many other people, I have set some goals for 2014. One of my goals... more frequent blog posts. I guess time will tell! 

My family is doing well. My husband Jim's NSCLC cancer is currently in "guarded optimism" as we wait to see if the chemo and radiation therapies were successful or not. Jim has more tests in the next few months. 

We will soon be facing more challenges as the new year rolls in. I will expand on those issues on another day. 

I am currently enjoying my canning-food hobby. I am trying new things. Since I am relatively new to canning, most everything I try is new! Ha! I would like to revive my sewing hobby this year. I would also enjoy taking the dog for walks again. 

Still ill...

My husband Jim continues to struggle with symptoms from his cancer, as well as the chemotherapy and radiation treatments that he had. Jim remains extremely tired, nauseous, and weak. The doctor stated last month that Jim's symptoms could continue for a year. We have a long road ahead of us. 

Good news...

22Oct2013 Jim’s appt, short answer: GOOD NEWS! Long answer: My husband Jim had his consultation today regarding his Lung Cancer status. We did not receive any bad news today. Jim’s most recent CT and PET did NOT show any worrisome activity. Jim’s pericardium and pulmonary vein looked good. There is a small area on the right lung that will be closely monitored, but we are not alarmed. The doctor feels, and we agree, that they have done all the chemotherapy and radiation that they can do at this point. The doctor would not say “remission”, we did ask him directly. The doctor did say “guarded optimism”. The doctor stated directly to Jim that he “expects the cancer to come back within two years”. This timeline falls in line with the information that we received at the time of Jim’s pneumonectomy. *Stage 4 NSCLC that has invaded the heart has its own set of parameters. During this phase we will have a “wait and see policy” with Jim having serial CTs and PETs. We are pleased with this update. This news is good news.

This status post comes just nine short months (to the day!) after I announced on my facebook that Jim had cancer. It is just ten short months (to the day!) from Jim’s very first appointment that began this journey. We had no idea at that time that it was cancer. Our lives have certainly changed during 2013. 

Waiting...

My husband, Jim, is still waiting for tests and test results to see if his stage 4 lung cancer is still active. These results will let us know if the cancer treatments were successful or not. Once we have the information, Jim can make a plan and move forward. The weeks of waiting are stressful. Hopefully, we will have information by the end of this month. 

No information...

My husband, Jim, has now completed his radiation regime for his stage 4 lung cancer NSCLC. The radiation center gave Jim a cheesy diploma (lol). Jim had already completed his four cycles of chemotherapy. Jim also completed an additional cycle of chemotherapy with a different drug.

Jim had his appointment with his oncologist. We learned… nothing. Yes your read that correctly, we learned nothing. Jim was told to “come back in five weeks” and “we’ll see how you’re doing”.

I think it is time for a second opinion. I do not like the vagueness and allusiveness of this doctor. The doctor tends to practice what I call “defensive doctoring”, meaning the tests, procedures, and health plan are all geared towards a CYA approach of doctoring and do not appear to be geared towards Jim’s unique cancer and unique situation. I was disappointed with the “nothing” report that we received.

Jim has consulted with another doctor to request that Jim’s CTs and PETs are reviewed and explained in full. Jim had asked his own oncologist but the oncologist never complied with Jim's request. As you may recall Jim had a complete left pneumonectomy. My specific concern is that Jim had a nodule in the right lung, and now they are not commenting about that nodule. If it is gone, that is actually a bad thing (not a good thing); because that means that there was actually cancer in the right lung. If the nodule is gone, that means that the chemo has worked to reduce the nodule, but the simple fact that the nodule was there at all means that the cancer has spread to other organs (the right lung). If the nodule is still there, that is actually a good thing because that means it is probably a fungus which is common in our area of the Midwest. 

On a more positive note, I suppose that a neutral "nothing" report is better than a negative report. 

Jim remains extremely nauseated. Jim remains extremely fatigued. Jim is doing his very best to manage his multiple symptoms, but it is a daily challenge. As I have said many times, and will continue to say: Play the cards that are dealt; and it is what it is.

More treatments...

My husband Jim is continuing his radiation treatments. The radiation should have ended by now, but the treatments were not deemed successful so the treatments will be extended by two weeks. Jim is also simultaneously utilizing chemotherapy treatments once per week. These chemo treatments will also be extended, but no end date has been set as of this posting. 

Jim continues to struggle with day-to-day living because he is so very tired and weak. Jim requires several naps per day, and yet he still feels quite fatigued. Things that Jim used to do, now go undone. 


Jim still has his hair. Jim was told that his first cycles of chemo would cause hair loss; but it did not. Jim was told that this round of radiation and chemo would cause hair loss; but it has not. When Jim became sick Jim had let his beard grow. Jim's beard became a sight with uneven growth. Recently, Jim decided to trim his beard. It looks much neater now. 

Jim tries to keep his spirits up, and for the most part he is successful. Of course he has his low moments, but overall Jim maintains a positive attitude. As we often say: It is what it is and play the cards that are dealt to you. 

What’s that…

Some days are easy. Some days are hard. Some days are only motions. 

I was sitting outside; just reading. I felt something on my face; I thought it was a fly. I swooshed it away. But, it wasn't a fly. It was a tear. Sometimes the tears fall and I don’t even realize it. 

I never dreamed that this would be my life. It is more difficult now than it was me 25 years ago. When it was me, I could handle it. When it is another, it is sometimes more than I can handle. 

My heart aches all the time. 

6 month goal...

Today is 12Aug2013. My husband Jim is now 6 months post-pneumonectomy! This was a calendar goal for us. Next calendar goal is March 12, 2014. Woot! Jim is having a lot of side effects from the radiation and new chemo, but he is hanging in there. Go Jim! 

I wish I had time today for a longer post about this, but I can't today. Sorry. 

It begins, C1d1...

The chemo begins. My husband, Jim, began his first day of cycle one of his chemotherapy. It is abbreviated as C1d1. Jim had treatments on day1, day2, and day3. Day 1 was nearly seven hours of treatment; day 2 was four hours; day 3 was five hours. Jim did very well on all three days. Jim had a good, positive attitude. Nausea was under control. Jim felt good physically, Jim had energy, and Jim felt strong. Jim continued becoming friends with the nurses, and some of the patients. It was amazing that there were no side effects. We were both very pleasantly surprised by no side effects.

Jim’s “Power Port” worked beautifully. The nurses used a special needle that went through Jim’s skin and into the port. They lightly secured this needle with tape to ensure that he didn't bump the needle. There were no multiple pokes to find a vein. There was no tenderness at the entry sight. Jim could not feel the medicine as it entered his body. They were able to deliver the meds at a slightly faster pace because of the port; which meant less time in “the chair.” I was glad that Jim had the port because we witnessed others in the room that struggled with finding a good vein. Those patients had severe bruising up and down their hands and arms. Jim had no pain, and no bruising.

Jim's chemo session on C1d2. 

The side effects begin. Beginning on day 4, Jim began to feel some side effects of the chemo. Jim became nauseated. His physical stamina was decreased. Jim’s positive attitude took a hit because he (and I) had thought perhaps he would avoid the nausea. Jim is not terribly sick, yet, but I’m sure that is to come. Jim’s weight is maintained. Jim has had no signs of hair loss. Both Jim and I understand that Jim will get worse before he gets better, but the reality of this statement is beginning to hit home. 

Gratitude...

Some people have said “just take one day at a time.” They are right. But, sometimes I have to take just one hour at a time… and days like today, I take one minute at a time. Jim is doing better and I am so glad to see him improving so much. I think perhaps his improvement is why I have begun to let my guard down. This morning I was looking through my Facebook page and reading all the supportive posts and comments. It moved me to tears of gratitude for the prayers, love, and support that is being shown to us; but my kids still had to wait three minutes before leaving for school and I didn't want to cry in front of them and ruin their day at school. I had to actively distract my mind so that I could hold it together for just three more minutes. It was difficult. Difficult due the emotions that were inside me, difficult because I am so physically tired, difficult because I was overwhelmed with gratitude, difficult because I have had to hold it together for so long… but I made it through those three minutes. The door to the house had not even shut and I was crying. I just really need to say thank you to everyone that has been lifting us up through our crisis. I need you. I appreciate you. I’m scared of the unknown paths that Jim and I will have to cross soon. Please continue your support. I am eternally grateful to you for things like prayers, encouraging words, and your fb comments and likes. They mean so much right now. So now, for the third time this morning I need to go reapply my make up because I have cried on it yet again.

“Tears are words from the heart that cannot be spoken.” ~unknown

Doctor called...

The doctor has called and confirmed that my husband, Jim, has lung cancer. (See previous posts for details.) We will be moving ahead quickly now. Jim will be having a PET  scan to be sure the cancer is only in the lung. If no new cancers, then surgery will be "soon". The doctor did not give a date/time, just "soon".  

Jim has told daughter Jessica, son Dan, daughter Kira, daughter Kristen, son Matt. Matt, age 11, took the news much better than we expected. Matt asked Jim if he was going to die. Jim answered "that is not my plan!" A few close friends and family know what we are dealing with. Jim will tell others in his own time. Thank you for your support. :)